Day 117

I was very fortunate today.  I happened to be on Canary Wharf, waiting for the ferry when I was treated to a gorgeous flash of pussy.  She was about 50 and wearing a white dress.  She was with a man and, when I arrived, they were engaged in a furious but of snogging.  She was sitting on the edge of the wharf on top of a pile of newspapers while he was kneeling beside her.  I noticed her hand in his crotch as I walk passed.

I went and sat in the waiting room (there’s no seats outside) where, unconsciously, I had a great view of them both.  The sun was shining in my eyes so I kept my hat on and tilted the brim down.  This gave me a wonderful view of her lower half.

After a good snog, he stood up and leaned against the glass of the waiting room.  Before he turned his back to me I noticed he had quite an obvious erection.  She knew it too and, I think, she wanted to tease him some more.  She opened her legs, giving him a wonderful view directly between her legs.

At the other end of the wharf, the Greenwich ferry had tied up and to avoid flashing the crew, she had angled her legs away from the ferry and towards the waiting room.  Because of this, I was treated to the same view as her companion.

She kept her legs open quite a long time and I can report she had a very sweet looking pussy.  Shaved and pink and wet.  Actually I have no idea whether it was wet but like to think she was enjoying herself. 

When she finally closed them, the man went back to her and gave her a hand up to her feet.  She leaned against the railing, looking out over the river.  He stood behind her, obviously rubbing his erection against her.

I wanted to thank her for the wonderful show but I’m fairly certain she didn’t know I’d seen anything because she didn’t give me a glance or anything to indicate she did.  I did give her a smile as we all boarded the ferry but she just smiled back in a sort of ‘hello’ way.

I couldn’t get a photo between her legs because of the sun on the glass around the waiting room but, once I joined them on the wharf, I did get this shot of them. 

The pair of them looked like they were going to have some serious sex soon.  While it's highly unlikely, if she ever does see this, I'd like to say thank you.

Of course, the whole experience has me dreaming about A doing the same thing but knowing the guy in the waiting room is watching.  I think A has a beautiful pussy and it’s a shame more people don’t get to see it.

Day 116

Had an email from A yesterday in which she suggested that at our next meeting we should increase my chances of release by only using one black and one white marble.  50/50?  I like those odds!  That made me quite excited.  I think I've been a bit downcast at the possibility of never having another orgasm so this was very welcome.  Of course, it's entirely up to her.

I had a rather fun day yesterday.  I decided not to wear the cage as I would be working in the garden most of the day and I decided to wear just a long t-shirt and panties.  For lunch I read in the garden wearing just the panties.  I enjoyed this far too much.

It's rare that someone would see me as the garden is well shielded but then, in the afternoon, there was a ring at the doorbell.  I just went to the door and answered it.

A woman in her 20s was standing there selling something (I can't remember what) and I stopped her before she could go into her schpeil and said I wasn't interested.  It was only when she looked down that I realised I was only wearing panties and the t-shirt.  I ignored it as best I could and continued to maintain I wasn't interested. She was smiling as she handed me a card and left.

I shut the door. My heart was beating fast and I was starting to get an erection.  It was a total buzz and very humiliating.  I'm just glad it wasn't a neighbour at the door!

The rest of the day was spent in a fog of excitement.  Later, while safely at my computer screen, I was just reading some porn when I came across this:

Ruined orgasms

That made me very excited too!

I quite liked wearing the panties yesterday so I've decided to spend the week in them (not the same pair, obviously) and not wear the cage.  I think I've reached a new stage of excitement.

Day 115

It looks like I’ll not have a chance of release until October 6 (and that’s by no means definite).  My sense of frustration comes and goes.  I find that when I’m not thinking about sex, I can easily ride the occasional waves of my chastity but when sex enters the equation, I feel an almost constant desire to orgasm.  It is at its worst in the mornings when I’m not wearing the cage.

This morning, for instance, I was in the middle of an erotic dream when my alarm woke me up and my erection was straining for release.  When I think about the dream it wasn’t even that erotic but clearly anything, however mild, sets me off at the moment.

If I really think about the feelings I have at the moment, the closest I could describe them would be that I am at the moment before sexual release.  What people call the ‘edge’, where one more step would see me plummeting to an all consuming orgasm.  I am standing at the edge, looking over at a place I have visited many times but it is just beyond my reach.

When I wake up with such a pervasive erection, I have to be very careful how much I squeeze it.  It wouldn’t take a lot for it to take that step and spoil everything.  I’m pretty sure, if this accidentally happened, that I’d ruin the orgasm.  While this is undesirable (metaphorically) at least it would give me something to write in this blog.  [I do requests!]

I’ll just finish this entry by describing the dream from this morning.

I was out with A and we had the marble draw which I managed to ‘win’ with two white marbles.  On the way home, A decided we’d stop in a lay-by for my release.  We parked up and left the car.  A, being generous, had unbuttoned her blouse and was letting me suck her nipples.  I then took the cage off and was about to start when another car pulled up and two guys came over to us.  A was wearing a skirt and, I discovered, no pants.  The two guys, ignoring me, complimented her and started mauling her still uncovered breasts.  From this point, the dream was all about A and the two men – I was forgotten.

There was a lot of touching, undressing and cocks being released.  I woke up as one of the guys entered A from behind.

Day 112

Sadly I didn't have another marble draw last night as A was feeling poorly.  We will have to reschedule.  Please.

Day 111

Another very difficult day.  I felt the urge to orgasm intensely.  Of course I resisted.  Wearing the cage helped...a little. 

Tomorrow night I have another go at the marbles (1 white, 4 black) and can only hope for two whites.  My chances grow slimmer every time.

Day 110

I watched some porn this afternoon.  Guys being forced to suck other guy's cocks sort of excited me.  Also one where a girl has to pay for a ride by being fucked by three guys.  And, finally, an old guy having his balls whacked by a girl wearing only a pair of tight full briefs.  I found the last one the most exciting.  I think it was something to do with the fact that he was helpless and she was laughing.

I had taken the cage off, ready for going out tonight, and it made me quite hard.  My cock seems to have grown a bit.

I think it really wants to come.  Pity...

Day 109

The new 'balls out' fashion for men who like to dangle but can't use their penis.

Day 108

I have been away for a few days.  I have tried not to think about sex.  Apart from morning erections, I have been successful.  I, therefore, have nothing else to report.

Day 105

Tonight was another marble draw.  Another black marble was added first (1 white 3 black) and three draws made.  A supervised.  My first marble was white and I was generally surprised (and not a little bit excited though it did occur to me that this could have happened on Monday).  The second draw was a black.  I replaced the marble and drew for the third time.  I handled A the marble without looking at it.

When, eventually, I was allowed to see it, I almost sobbed.  It was black.  No relief then.  I'm not sure when I'll see A again but when I do, another black will be added to the bag (1 white, 4 black) and A has threatened a best of five draws.

We also discussed our competition (if and when I ever come again) and I suggested to her that we should set a time limit and, at the end, draw marbles for relief.  I added that if she drew a white marble, I'd get to watch her masturbate.

While I think that's only fair, it does occur to me how frustrating that will be for me.  Exciting but frustrating.


I found this image on the Internet yesterday and really like it.  I would enjoy it very much. [hint hint]

Day 104

One of the problems I have with the cage is when I wash.  Now, I'm certain that it's perfectly acceptable to shower with the cage on but I never feel really clean so I tend to remove it, shower, then get it back on asap.  The trouble is, my penis grows (obviously) and it takes a while for it to shrink back down to an acceptable size.

For instance, here it is just after my shower with the cage for comparison.  I call this a 'shower chubby'.

As you can see, it is not going to fit!  I have tried cold water and ice before but, oddly, this just makes me harder because I'm doing something to it!  And so I have to wait.  And wait.  Until, eventually, it fits.  Like this.

Ah, much better.  It always amazes me how small it can get when it really, really tries.

Today I wondered how long it will be before I have another orgasm.  After tomorrow night, who knows how long it will before I see A again.  The thought of going without is starting to fill my head with chills.  The thought of A playing with it again fills my head with joy.

Day 103

After the excitement of yesterday, today has been spent busy painting so I've not had a lot of sexy thoughts.  I was going to have to remove the cage for an evening out but the person cancelled at the last moment meaning I could keep it on!  I am also not going into London tomorrow for my usual Wednesday lunch date so it can stay on until Friday morning.  I feel a lot happier with this!

Yesterday A asked about the world record and, to be honest, I'm not sure how it would be verified unless the person responsible for adjudging it a world record spent every minute with the person attempting it!  When it's a question of not having an orgasm, that would be impossible.

My investigations, however, have found that six months is not uncommon in chastity circles, with some people aiming for a year.  I have read about one guy (definitely a major sub) who has willingly given up any chance of an orgasm.  He is permanently in chastity and his wife has a lover to satisfy her.  I'm pretty sure this is probably a fantasy rather than fact!

Meanwhile, A has suggested we have a competition to see which of us can hold out longest without an orgasm.  I am tempted to compete with her.  My only fear is knowing how competitive she is.  I am concerned she may be capable of lasting an awful lot longer than me!  This concept (appealing though it is) needs more thought.

Day 102

And so.  The big day.  I had the marbles, as instructed and two black and one white were put into the bag for selection.  I was told (by A) to choose with my eyes closed and she hid it in her pocket, to bring out when she decided.  For a few hours then, I had no idea whether I would be getting a release or not.  The suspense was wonderful.  Whenever I saw that little round bulge in her pocket, I would harden in expectation.

Before revealing the colour we discussed what would happen if it was black.  We (she) decided that we would then have another selection the next time we see each other.  Fortunately that will be in three days time.  I will add another black marble to the set, giving me worse odds.  If the marble was white she was going to have me orgasm straight away.

Eventually she placed the marble in my hand.  It was black.  No release then.

She then came up with a 'best of three' selection for next time.  Therefore, in order to have an orgasm I would have to select two whites out of three picks.  With there being one white and three blacks, this will reduce my chances considerably.  I found this strangely exciting.

Something that I found even more exciting was the fact that she had a good inspection of the cage, twisting, pulling and squeezing me through the bars of the cage.  She also had a good feel of my balls.  I was hoping for a hard squeeze but thoroughly enjoyed being handled all the same.  My erection was straining and left me totally frustrated.

A thought occurs to me that if I pick a black for the first or second marble she should hit or squeeze my balls.  I'm not sure if she would do this but I think I'd enjoy it.  Particularly if I was to get an orgasm afterwards.

I should also confess that she looked very sexy today.  I found it difficult keeping my hands off her.  Though I did.

Day 101

It is with mixed feelings that I head towards my release.  Naturally I want to have an orgasm (even a ruined one would be welcome) but it has been so long now that it feels like ‘giving in’.  Of course, depending on what the marbles decide, I may not get an orgasm at all tomorrow.

Speaking of ruined orgasms...I just read an interesting blog post about one here:  Ruined Orgasm by jnuts

I have been very busy for the last two days (which has been quite a good thing) and, I’m pretty sure, I missed my cycle day.  I reason this because whenever I sit and think for a bit, I start to get hard and strong feelings of wanting to fuck, course through me.  It’s also dangerous touching myself so I am avoiding this as much as I can.  Sadly I am unable to wear the cage until tomorrow.  I must be strong.  And work through it.

In the shower tonight, I realised how harsh I am with my balls.  I use a big scrubbing brush and give them a fairly ferocious going over.  Of course, it's easy knowing how hard or where to hit them when you're attached.  That's why accidental (but well directed) collisions are always best.

Have heard from A about the marbles tomorrow.  She clearly does not want me to get a white marble!  Glad she's enjoying it too.

Day 100

I find it very difficult to believe I haven’t had an orgasm for 100 days.  Three figures.  It’s a major milestone and one that I feel both proud and foolish about.  Why am I doing this?  Am I mad?  It seems such a ridiculous length of time.  With the prospect of it lasting even longer than next Monday, I’m beginning to doubt my sanity.

The longer my chastity goes on, the more I feel A is in charge of my release to the point that, now, I’m not sure I’d feel right about coming without her being there.  And each time we email, the frustration grows with the possibilities.

Last night, I had great difficulty getting to sleep, thinking about Monday.  Her threat to stop my orgasm had me thinking all sorts of deliciously frustrating scenarios.  In order to get to sleep, I had to start thinking about other things; things with no sexual meaning at all.  These things would inevitably lead back to my forthcoming release.  And so it would start again.  Finally I managed to get to sleep.

And then, this morning, I woke feeling incredibly frustrated.  Not wearing the cage meant I had a raging erection that just begged for relief (interestingly, my cock seems bigger than it's ever been when hard and smaller when soft).  I managed to ignore it but all day I've felt on edge.  Perhaps I need to read some Bible passages.  Though I need to steer clear of anything to do with Sodom & Gomorrah.

I am clearly mad.

Day 99

Now, it could just be wishful thinking but I'm pretty sure I saw a guy and his keyholder today.

I was standing at Waterloo station, waiting for R when I noticed a woman rather impatiently waiting near me.  She was tutting and clearly not very happy.  What I noticed most of all was the key that hung from her bracelet.  It was quite small and, I'm sure, merely symbolic rather than meant for a real lock.  Still, once seen, it was very obvious.

I didn't think anything more about her as R turned up and we went to get on the train.  And then, as we sat and chatted, the woman gets on the train followed by this guy.

They sat across the aisle and a seat further up from us, him facing me.  I had a very clear view of his crotch and I swear he looked like he was wearing a chastity device.  His jeans were quite tight and it was resting down the side of his leg.  I guess he could have had a very short but thick erection but, if so, he had it for the entire trip.

Of course, I couldn't wear the cage today so it wasn't like I could compare notes with him.

Day 98

In a brave (or foolhardy) attempt to please A, I left my fly open all day while wearing the cage.  To my knowledge, no-one saw it.  I spent a lot of time 'out and about' so, I guess there's a chance some passing motorist saw it and had a good chuckle behind a car window.  I wasn't on any trains so the golden opportunity wasn't forthcoming. 

Strangely, at first I was really concious of it and worried but after about half an hour, I completely forgot.  It wasn't until the first time I went to the loo that I remembered.  Speaking of which, I even used a urinal in case someone else came into the loo at the same time as me but no-one did.

Day 97

Today I was favoured with views of three bottoms and afforded a view of the cage.  All bottoms were female and all were courtesy of very short skirts and tights with no knickers.  The first was the best.

It was as I left the train at Waterloo.  A young woman left the train in front of me.  She was carrying a big bag over her shoulder and towing a sizeable wheelie bag behind her.  The bag over her shoulder had managed to hitch her skirt and coat up, almost to her waist.  Walking behind her I enjoyed the sight of her perfect bottom as we made our way to the ticket barriers.

I was very tempted to tell her but have run into this problem before and am never quite sure what to do.  I once told a woman her skirt was hitched up and she told me off, calling me perv.  This reaction to my gallant behaviour has made me somewhat reticent in its repetition.  And so, tortured by feelings of moral duty and social conventions, I just stared at her almost naked bottom.

The second sighting was on the Hungerford Bridge.  She was posing for a photograph, back to the river, against the railing.  The wind very kindly lifted her skirt just as I was within range.  I think she was too busy staying still for the photograph and ignored the fact that she was flashing everyone her bottom.  I can’t be sure that she was naked under her tights because I only saw one side exposed.

The third sighting was at an outdoor restaurant and was, again, the result of a piece of luggage hoisting the skirt higher than it should have been.  It was a bit disconcerting because the woman was standing quite close to my seated position (I could have reached out and touched her), talking to her friends.  She stayed there for quite a while before they decided where to sit.  She definitely had no pants on.

This makes me wonder whether this is the new fashion.  I’ve always assumed that women wearing tights and short skirts (or t-shirt or jumper) would wear pants under the tights for just such moments as these.  It seems I am delightfully wrong.

On the train home I decided to leave my fly down and see if anyone noticed.  I never want this to look too obvious so I generally only have my pants showing.

I was sat in the last seat of the last carriage alone until we reached Surbiton where a group of people boarded the carriage and filled the seats around me.  A woman (about 40) sat next to me.  I concentrated on my book and avoided looking at her.

She left the train at Woking (about 15 minutes later) and just before standing up she leant into me and whispered that my fly was undone.  Acting flustered, I apologised and reached down to pull the zipper up.  As I did I realised that my penis was clearly on show.  Having popped out of my pants it was laying across the inside of the opening.  It must have looked a bit odd.  And now I wonder whether she knew about it for the entire trip or if she only spotted just before she left the train.  Needless to say, it made me all excited.

It was a real pity I wasn't wearing the cage. I have tried to reproduce what she would have seen.

Day 96

Another day of runny nose and awful cough, although I feel much better than yesterday and would gladly have had an orgasm.  I found A's comment yesterday oddly exciting.  I thought about it as a ruined orgasm which should not be exciting but somehow, at this stage, is.

Today I did feel the odd twinge of excitement at various times.  Most notably in Starbucks where I had a great view of a woman's pants as she sat reading and the view of a jogger in an all in one running outfit, while walking in the park.  I must be feeling better if my perv radar is working properly!

Day 95

I am so glad that today is not my release day.  I am full of cold and feel completely rotten.  It would have been a total waste of an orgasm.

It has just occurred to me that I will be over 100 days when I finally do come.

Day 93

Talk about missed opportunities!  Last night, sitting in a beer garden, I was talking with a group of friends, B sitting (very closely) next to me.  I mentioned I would be staying in town at the flat and B asked "Can I stay with you?" in a sort of half jokey plaintive way.  I'm fairly sure she would have done had I said "yes".  Damn it!

I guess I could have used it as a test of my self control.  I was slightly drunk so could have used that as an excuse.  Trouble is it would have felt a bit weird using the flat (plus it was a mess).  The biggest problem is that I would love to have a night of sex with B.  Oh well, I guess that's that then.

And so, I sat in the flat, naked and miserable, looking out the window when a couple started making out.  She was wearing black bra and pants, he had a suit on.  It was like watching a movie.

I was thoroughly enjoying it.  Then, annoyingly, the people in the flat above me who were having a party, started yelling and yahooing.  The couple looked up, across the road and separated. She didn't seem too bothered but the guy looked a bit annoyed as he turned the lights off.  In the next window (the bedroom) she threw herself onto the bed and the man closed the blinds.

Day 91

A new development.  I will be waiting for a while longer now before release.  It had been scheduled for next Monday but due to unforeseen circumstances, it will now be the Monday after. The realisation that A now has complete control of my orgasm gave me the beginnings of an erection.  The cage stopped this nonsense immediately.

In the meanwhilst...here's a target, especially for A.  In case she's feeling generous...when I do eventually see her.